My baby was too fat to breathe (Part 2)

by Ashford - 1

Existing in the NICU is a surreal experience. You know the world is continuing to spin and people are living their lives like normal. But your world stops. Your world is confined to a unit on a hospital floor. Your only interactions are the nurses, doctors, and the cafeteria staff. During shift changes no parents were allowed on the floor so I would wander around the hospital exploring every hallway, nook, and cranny. I learned where the free ice machine was and the hours of the coffee kiosk. After a few days I blended in with the machines and not even the nurses saw me anymore. I sat in the corner rocking my baby watching. I watched terrified parents arrive after

My baby was too fat to breathe (Part 1)

by Ashford - 0

I was just finishing my first cup of coffee when they started. That familiar tightening in my belly. Slow, steady, strong. I knew that this would be the day that we would welcome our little boy into the world. Having been through labor and delivery with my daughter I knew what to expect. I quickly jumped into the shower knowing it might be awhile before I would get this luxury again.  The contractions continued while I finished my shower and blow dried my hair. I called my husband to let him know he should probably wrap things up at work and head home. I decided to straighten my hair and apply some light makeup because pictures. When he came home we calmly packed

Diagnosed with Cancer: A Google Story

by Ashford - 5

Recently Google made waves with the launch of the ability to download your entire search history. It horrifies some people and intrigues others (like me). What secrets do you an Google share that no one else knows? It got me thinking. And it got me searching. And as I delved into my own personal Google history it told a story. I’ve written a lot over the last few months about our crash collision with cancer as my husband was diagnosed with stage 3 melanoma in early July. As I scanned through my searches it gave me a window into the whirlwind of surviving a cancer diagnosis. It’s not the typical story, but it’s an interesting spin. You can literally “see” the thought

Beer, Bathrobes, and #Brunchpants

by Ashford - 1

I was always one of those “misfit kids”. You know the ones who don’t really “fit” anywhere. I spent years and years honing my chameleon tendencies to fit any and every social situation. I could change my stripes at a moments notice. I could adapt to fit in everywhere but I never really belonged anywhere. I never could find a place with “the girls”. The trouble started in early elementary school when I found myself the fallen angel from the mean girls clan. This rivaled "The Plastics" (ala Lindsay Lohan) and would haunt me all the way through high school. I wasn’t a “girly-girl”- never had been. In kindergarten my best friends were boys and we spent hours climbing and falling out

A tale of two girls

by Ashford - 1

Once upon a time there were two girls. They were named Ashford and Lauren and although they were cut from the same cloth they were very very different. You see Ashford is ready for the world in all it’s glory. And Lauren is timid and afraid that she might be hurt. Ashford is secure in her faith knowing that God always has a plan regardless of her agenda. Lauren sometimes wonders if there really even is a God and if there is does He really even see her? Ashford is funny and dynamic and magnetizing. Lauren wishes she could disappear sometimes and worries what other people think of her at every move. Ashford has dealt with her husband’s diagnosis of cancer with tenacity and

The devil in my eggs

by Ashford - 1

It started out as the “pity assignment”. I had finally married and it was now my duty to show up with a covered dish at every family event. But they knew that I couldn’t cook much besides Easy Mac and Ramen so they decided to do me a favor. The “easy” assignment for my first Easter was the deviled eggs. Now I realize that this must seem simple to you too however I assure you it was not. You see, I can boil an egg but I cannot, for the life of me, peel an egg. I started out with 18 eggs, googled “boiling an egg”, and got to work. However, after I began peeling the eggs I realized this was

Taking back the cheese drawer. Taking back my life.

by Ashford - 5

  I love cheese. I love all kinds of cheese. Stinky cheese, expensive cheese, squirt cheese (which isn’t really even cheese). Six months ago I emptied out my cheese drawer and filled it with boxes of chemotherapy. A drug that I was to inject into my husband’s belly 3 times a week. I hate chemotherapy. I hate the side effects, I hate the emotions, I hate the mental battle it is to inject someone you love with something you know darn well is poisonous. I hate watching him suffer. So many of you have been following our story over the past several months. You know that 8 months ago our world got rocked when the hubs was diagnosed with Stage 3 Melanoma. (If

The vineyard in my closet

by Ashford - 4

  Let me start by saying that my husband is one of those “All In” kind of guys. Like he has 2 speeds: 1. Off and 2. 436 mph. He’s also one of those “good at everything he tries” people. I know. It’s TOTALLY annoying to me too. Over the years I’ve gotten used to his (let’s call them) eccentricities. I can take him in stride now.  He doesn’t even phase me. For example, I returned home from working late one night and when I opened the garage doors I saw him sitting there (in my parking spot) with 3 huge tables, a gigantic commercial grade sewing machine, and enough sunbrella material to cover the state of South Carolina. Did I flinch? Did

The Licecapades

by Ashford - 0

So there's a new SUPERLICE?! As if the world wasnt a horrible enough place without the existence of this horrid creature. And to top it off we got "the lice notice" in the school newsletter today and after spending the next 25 minutes scratching my head, my body, my feet, and anything else I could reach I decided to dredge up this old post in case any of you might need help navigating the Licecapades.  So you found your first louse on your little darling’s head. Resist the urge to immediately burn down your house and swallow the vomit that just made its way into your mouth. It's ok. This is totally doable.  1. Here's your shopping list.       - Lice shampoo (we used

That time Pinterest almost blinded me

by Ashford - 2

Anyone who knows me knows that I have a penchant for DIY projects. I blame Pinterest. Since discovering this evil genius website I have spent countless hours grating bars of soap for homemade laundry detergent, melting beeswax and coconut oil for face wash, and dehydrating my own chili peppers to make my own taco seasoning.  Well, the clothes never did quite smell clean and after several months I resorted to buying the overpriced chemical filled detergent again. I suffered through weeks of breakouts akin to being a 13 year old girl going through puberty after the coconut oil proved too greasy for my skin type. And the chili peppers? Well, that’s a story that warrants a little detail. I got a dehydrator

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