This isn’t a blog post, an essay, or a funny story. I feel the need to say this because I have a lot of followers for a lot of different reasons. This started out as a way for friends and family to follow my crazy stories and somehow it snowballed into this big awesome thing. In fact most of you follow me simply because that one time I rubbed a urinal cake all over my face before I realized what it was (and I’m glad to have you all here). But if you don’t know me and aren't invested in my story or my family feel free to dip out of this post. All this post is going to be